this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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