ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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