I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
