No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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