i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize