Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
It's never too late to be topless.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
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