what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
