I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
How's work?
Spinning.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
