If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
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