at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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