he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
