I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
No more Irish car bombs ever.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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