So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Randomize