No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Randomize