I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
