So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
