K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Randomize
