Betty ford says i'm here all night
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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