Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
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