I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
they're like a gay fantastic four
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
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