whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
