is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
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