wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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