im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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