I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
