never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize