i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
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