Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize