Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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