that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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