Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
