Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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