Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize