I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
