I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize