There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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