moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
