She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
She even gives head with a lisp.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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