the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
