those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
