Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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