I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize