I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
