Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Randomize
