Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize