i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
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