**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
