Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
We're not piercing ourselves today.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Randomize
