gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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