Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
