she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Randomize
