Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
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